Are You Comfortable Feeling Incompetent? You Should Be.

On a 2017 episode of The EntreLeadership Podcast, Ken Coleman interviewed author and entrepreneur Seth Godin.  Ken introduced him as one of the most brilliant thinkers of our time.

Seth then completed the interview, and he did not disappoint.

He says that if we are to change (hear: grow!) we must be comfortable with feeling incompetent.

Seth continued.

Often people do not change because they don’t want to be uncomfortable and feel incompetent.

He says this feeling of incompetence, however, is often a prerequisite to growth and change. 

People who resist these negative feelings are less likely to grow…less likely to change.

How can we apply this understanding? 

Well, if you are a leader in an organization–which many of you are–one take-away, Seth suggests, is to not be surprised when your people do not immediately embrace the change you want to bring into your company.

You likely hired these people for their competence, so don’t be surprised when they resist the feelings of incompetence that come with new initiatives.  Be patient with them.

Also, as you go forward, hire people who are not only competent, but also curious and humble…in other words, they are willing to go through the negative feelings of incompetence because they value change and growth more than always feeling competent.

It may take a little longer in the interviewing process, but it will be worth it in the long run.

How can I apply this in my personal life?

Be aware of this dynamic any time you are presented with something new (for instance, a planning process like Think Time that is a little different than everyone else…moving beyond mere lines and words and including new techniques like visualization, drawing, and mind-mapping).

Embrace the fact that you may be naturally inclined to resist things that are good for you because you don’t want to feel incompetent.

Have a conscious dialogue with yourself before you say “no” to a great opportunity.

Are you resisting because you are uncomfortable with feelings of incompetence?

Can you reframe the feelings of incompetence to mean that you are making progress toward change and growth?

Can you use this new understanding to set yourself on a new learning trajectory this coming year?

Be encouraged.  Because and not many people are willing to move through the uncomfortable feelings of incompetence, you can quickly set yourself apart from your competition by embracing it as a prerequisite for growth and change.  Embrace this mindset tip, and you are already a step ahead.

What are your thoughts?

What is one thing you have learned that has changed your life? 

Was it uncomfortable at first to learn it?

Are you glad you learned it in spite of your initial resistant feelings?

Please tell us about it in the comments below.

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Think Time Purpose Planners

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Imagine a Place…

Imagine with me for a moment.

Imagine a place of purpose and productivity.

Imagine a group of people in the habit of being creative.

Imagine a team that works toward a common goal with a common language.

Imagine a department that has a clear vision of success in the mind of every member.

Imagine a company where every person completes the most important task first.

Imagine an organization with a language that fosters clear communication.

Imagine a group of people who are in the habit of being thankful.

Imagine a team that had an understanding of which activities were the most important.

Imagine a team that actively purged time-wasters from the schedule.

Imagine a meeting in which every member was prepared, rested, healthy, and present.

Imagine a culture that values both relationships and results.

Imagine the results of an organization that often asked, “How can we make this even better?”

Now, imagine if the tools and the training for such a place were at your fingertips.

Here they are.

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Think Time Purpose Planners

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Infuse your place with innovation, purpose, productivity and life balance with our Think Time Purpose Planners with online training and ongoing support here.

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Life is moving fast.  You are losing valuable time.  We have created an innovative process that helps you to dream bigger, get more time for what matters most, and become who you want to be.

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4 Reasons Why You Need to Delegate from Your Team’s Perspective By: Bryan Miles, CEO and Co-founder of BELAY

It’s easy to get caught up in your new ability to delegate, that you forget about the other side of equation — how your team feels when it comes to your delegation. Have you ever wondered what they might be thinking as you entrust your tasks and responsibilities to them? Their perception is a key part of the delegation equation.

You’re ability to delegate to others is only one side of it. When you delegate to a team member, you must remember to keep your team’s perspective in mind, too.

Delegation From Your Team’s Perspective

In the journey of working to create ideal working relationships, we stopped and asked ourselves a very hard question … what is it like to be on the “other” side of my delegation?

Below are the top 4 things I have discovered that employees wish their leaders knew:

1)  Employees really hunger to know the WHY behind the WHAT of the tasks they are being asked to do.  Helping your employees to know and understand the WHY will most-always produce successful outcomes.

2)  People don’t mind being led as long as they feel appreciated along the way.  Be conscience to show your gratitude for their time and efforts and celebrate their accomplishments.

3)  Know what makes your team tick.  Is it words of affirmation, a flexible schedule, public recognition, or time off?  Take the time to know and understand your team and their needs and you will create a strong working relationship and a loyal employee.

4)  Be someone your team and or employees WANT to like and they will follow you and support you in all you do.

Remember, don’t forget that you are successful on the hard work of others. If you have their back, and they believe it, they’ll have your back!

Ready to start delegating? Download the Delegation Matrix

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Bryan Miles, CEO and Co-founder of BELAY

A Virtual Assistant Company Helping You Climb Higher

Easily identify the tasks that only you can do (and what others can do for you) with Belay’s Delegation Download.

Special Offers from Belay and Think Time:

Watch our free webinar with Belay: “The Art of Delegation.”

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5 Steps to Becoming An Effective Delegator

By Guest Writer: Bryan Miles, CEO and Co-founder of BELAY

Delegation may not always come naturally to you, and for some of us, we are constantly trying to perfect this area of leadership. It’s worth striving for perfection because when you have motivated people who trust you, you’ll see your business propelled forward. Simon Sinek says this of delegation: “You have to earn trust by communicating and demonstrating that you share the same values and beliefs. You have to talk about your WHY and prove it with WHAT you do. Again, a WHY is just a belief, HOWs are the actions we take to realize that belief, and WHATs are the results of those actions. When all three are in balance, trust is built and value is perceived.”

Here are a few key points that I have realized over the years to help me perfect my “Art of Delegation”. Take what works for you and make it your own in your journey to building trust with your team.

Start With the End in Mind

1)  Delegation to me is “beginning with the end in mind.”  Meaning … asking those on my team to execute tasks that serve an ultimate purpose and either solve a problem or move our business forward.  Assigning these tasks help me free up space/time in my day so that I can take care of the “one-offs” and critical daily tasks that I, as a Leader, need to attend to.

2)  When you delegate, delegate a result not a task.  What is the end result that you are looking for?  Give your teammate and/or employee the opportunity to work toward a goal and then celebrate the result with them.  Not only will you give them something to celebrate but you have also given them a sense of ownership and responsibility for their projects/efforts.

3)  Don’t delegate things you love doing.  In most cases, the things you HATE to do take more time to do and distract you from the goals you are working toward.  Delegate those tasks to team members who are more qualified and or patient and willing to execute those items so you won’t be bogged down by doing them.

4)  Express to your team the WHY behind the WHAT so they can feel passionate about the projects they are executing. Understand that people will strive and toil … and the WHY can fuel them.

5)  Be mindful of the tasks you ask others to execute (from a timing and knowledge-base perspective) and express gratitude to them when tasks are complete.  This creates a greater relationship with you and your employees and makes you someone they will want to follow.

You don’t have to jump in with all these ideas at once. Try a few out and see what happens when you focus on the why behind your tasks and the ultimate result you want with each delegation assignment.

The art of delegation isn’t just about you as a leader though and how you divvy out assignments. Delegating is about knowing your team and the powerful part they play in the process. When employees know your motivation and recognize your trust, they feel more connected to the mission of your business. When there is trust, you will then see a healthier bottom line, which translates directly into everyone’s success.

In our next blog, we delve into understanding the role your employees play in delegation.

Bryan Miles Head Shot 2017

Bryan Miles, CEO and Co-founder of BELAY

A Virtual Assistant Company Helping You Climb Higher

Easily identify the tasks that only you can do (and what others can do for you) with Belay’s Delegation Download.

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On Life Balance: Protect Your Focus

You know what it is like to finally have the time to sit down and work on that project you’ve been wanting to do…

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But.

You’ve.

Got.

Nothing.

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Your mind won’t stop wandering.

You simply cannot bring about the results you want.

Simply put, you cannot focus.

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There are a lot of secrets to boosting your focus, and nine are woven into the Think TimeTM 3DR Process.  However, we are going to talk about one other strategy I believe is foundational to all of the others.  Without it, when you are ready to focus, you simply won’t be able to.

With it, you will exponentially increase your mind’s ability to focus on demand.

This strategy is so underutilized in our culture, that if you apply it, you will immediately gain a decided edge.

Without it, your mind will simply not have refueled sufficiently to bring about the focus you need.

Are you ready?

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Make the most of your time by allowing your mind to Drift.

Allowing your mind to Drift will–among other things–actually boost your brain’s ability to focus.

When your mind Drifts, your brain is actually quite active.

If you were to take an MRI image of your brain when you’re not thinking about anything in particular, it would be incredibly colorful.  A part of your brain called the Default Neural Network (DNN) is activated.  When the DNN is active, executive functioning skills such as focusing are strengthened.

So, set some time aside this week to allow your mind to Drift.  Take a walk without your phone.  Drive without the radio.  Pause before a meeting simply to “be.”

And, afterwards, you will be better able to focus like you need.

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This world is sooo distracting!

What would you do if you could finally focus?

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Christine M. Wilson, LPC
Co-Founder, Think Time
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Think Time 3DR Process

Life is moving fast.  We are losing valuable time.  We have created an innovative process that helps people to dream big, get more time for what matters most, and become who they want to be.

Find out how Think Time can help you make the most of your time

by boosting your focus at think-time.com.

Shop Purpose Programs with online training here.

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“I Have to Get It All Done Now!” – On Delegation

We are in the middle of a series of blogs answering a difficult question.

“When I have filtered my tasks through the dream and decide phases of Think Time, and I still have a pile of to-dos that must be done, what do I do?”

To conquer this familiar problem, we are going to use the above sentence: “I Have to Get It All Done Now!”

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Today, we are going to focus on the first word, “I.”

When we are facing an insurmountable pile of to-dos that are imperative, one way to cut it down is to ask yourself the following question:

What can only I do?”

When, you are overwhelmed with all you have to do, sift your list into two categories according to this question.

Keep the items that only you can do, and delegate the remaining to capable others.

This can be difficult if you are in crunch time and are not accustomed to delegating.  Here are some ideas, however, to get you started.

  • Is this actually someone else’s job?  Do I need to take a look at my internal boundaries and make sure that I am not enabling or rescuing someone?  Hand it over to them.  It’s theirs.
  • Is there someone, anyone, who can grow through completing this task?  (To see the value of this, check out Mark Miller’s new book Leaders Made Here.)
  • Can new technology and innovations help me get this done faster?
    • Can you use Fiverr.com to hire tasks to be completed for work or the TaskRabbit app for a home task?
  • Is there someone you can hire in addition to your current team?
    • Do you need to onboard a top-level assistant?  Try Belay Solutions for a smart Virtual Assistant to help you manage your work life and your personal life–scheduling travel arrangements, organizing your inbox, or finding the best dry cleaner that delivers in your area.

If you are like me, you are feeling a new sense of hope in your chest and a lightness on your shoulders.  Feeling like we have to do it all can really weigh heavily on us.

The next time, you sense, “I Have to Do It All Now,” just remember this one question, “What can only I do?” and delegate the rest!

If were able to delegate to someone else, what is the first thing you would get off your plate?

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Think Time 3DR Process

We have a serious problem.  We are losing valuable time.  We have created an innovative process that helps people to dream big, get more time for what matters most, and become who they want to be.

Do you need more time for what you value most?

Find out if Think Time is a fit for you at think-time.com.

 

Blog Highlights:

“What can only I do?” #delegation http://ow.ly/XGxx30iqc4S

Keep the tasks that only you can do, and delegate the rest. http://ow.ly/XGxx30iqc4S

Am I doing someone else’s work? #boundaries http://ow.ly/XGxx30iqc4S

Could someone else develop their skills by completing this task?  #delegate http://ow.ly/XGxx30iqc4S

Can new technology and innovations help me get this done faster?  http://ow.ly/XGxx30iqc4S

Is there someone you can hire in addition to your current team?http://ow.ly/XGxx30iqc4S

Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I personally believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

“I HAVE TO Get It All Done Now!” – on Internal Locus of Control

Last time, we looked at “upping” our internal satisfaction with our accomplishments by starting with the idea that it all will not get done today.  When we start our days with this acceptance, our minds immediately get to work to prioritize what must be done.

Start with accepting the disappointment that it will not all get done.  Then, prioritize what is most important.

And, rest assured each day that what is accomplished is the most important.

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Let’s say, however, that you have completed the Dream and Decide phases of Think Time, and you legitimately have a pile of to-dos that has to get done immediately, or the consequences are dire.

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What do you do then?

The next several blogs will focus on answering this question–the Think Time way.  Just remember: #thinkbeforeyoustrive.

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To look at this situation strategically, we will use the above sentence as our guide.  “I Have to Get It All Done Now.”

In this blog, we’ll focus on the two little words “have to.”

For ten years, the words “have to” have been banned from our family’s vocabulary after reading a book called QBQ by John Miller.

This thought-changing little book dissects the two little words “have to” and unmasks all of their terribleness.

These two little words steal life, opportunity, success, happiness, and freedom from so many of us.

They immediately frame our experience as that of a victim instead of a person making choices that impacts our own lives

They render us powerless instead of powerful.

They make us less creative instead of more creative.

They steal our hope and offer instead feelings of despair.

 

But.

 

Only if we let them.

 

Whether we know it or not, we have a choice when we encounter the words “have to.”

When we find the words “have to” in our lives, we can render these powerful words powerless with one simple trick.  

Change “have to” to “choose to.”  

This one act puts you back in the driver’s seat of your own life, and allows you to evaluate your decisions from the right point of view.

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Your thoughts, feelings, attitudes, actions, and boundaries are “in your circle.”  They are your choice.  You begin to see yourself as responsible for your successes and your failures.

You begin to develop what psychologists call an “internal locus of control.”

When your language reflects this, your thoughts and actions follow.  Opportunities for change and growth appear where they were previously hidden.  Hope is restored.  Growth and change take up residence in your heart.

In Smarter Faster Better, Charles Duhigg writes, “People with an internal locus of control tend to earn more money, have more friends, stay married longer, and report greater professional success and satisfaction.”

No longer will you feel powerless when you have a pile of to-dos just staring at you.

The next time you feel “under the pile,” listen to your language and try this simple tweak.

Change your “have tos” to “choose tos” and see what happens.

Then, please let us know how it went in the comments below!

 

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Think Time 3DR Process

We have a serious problem.  We are losing valuable time.  We have created an innovative whole brain process that helps people to dream big, get more time for what matters most, and become who they want to be.

Do you need more time for what you value the most?

Find out if Think Time is a fit for you at think-time.com.

The 80/20 Rule

One question I get often is, “Can you explain the 80/20 Rule?”

At Think Time, as we help people focus on what matters most, we use the 80/20 rule in all of our systems.

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The one thing I can say about the 80/20 Rule is that when you get it…you GET it.  And, you will never go back.

There is an interesting history behind it, but the Big Idea is that it teaches us to look at activities—not for how much effort we put into them, but for the results that flow from them.  Do they move the needle toward our goals?

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We can work really hard at something that doesn’t return a lot of results.  We can also strategically place small, targeted efforts toward something that yields enormous results.

This is the tip that helps us to stop spinning our wheels and start making traction.

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Why is it named “The 80/20 Rule?”  The rule derives its name from the discovery that in life about 20% of our activities generate 80% of our results.  The converse is also true.  About 80% of our activities yield only 20% of our results.

80 20 Rule

The 80/20 Rule is regularly used in business training to boost profits and skyrocket results.  For instance, salespeople regularly use this rule to close more deals.  If about 80% of sales come from 20% of the customers, then calling the list in alphabetical order from top to bottom will not be as fruitful as taking a moment to identify the high yielding 20% and to contact them first.  Less effort yields more results with the 80/20 Rule.

At Think Time, we are big on results—not only professional results but also personal and relational results.  So, we apply the 80/20 Rule to everything from creating agendas and budgets at work to household responsibilities and even our relationships.

Following are some examples of how the 80/20 Rule may integrate with your daily life.  A 20% activity is an activity that yields HIGH RESULTS.  An 80% activity yields LOW RESULTS–no matter how much effort you exert.

Here we go!

A 20% activity could be taking  a few minutes at the beginning of the day to identify your key priorities and to purge potential obstacles to accomplishing them.  Top performers do this every day because it yields such great results.  This move changes every action following it.

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An 80% activity could be trying to complete “everything” on your list.  Remember that all of your activities are not high-yielding and often “good” activities steal time from the best.

A 20% activity could be having a clear agenda created and floating it by everyone before a meeting.  This simple step maximizes the minutes during the meeting, prevents running over due to sloppy discussions, and prevents countless add-on e-mail interchanges after the meeting.

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An 80% activity may be always saying “yes” when someone stops by your desk to say, “Gotta minute?”

At home, a 20% activity could be training your toddlers to clean up.  You are not only getting the toys cleaned, but you are building a sense of responsibility into a citizen of the world.

An 80% activity could be picking up your four year old’s toys again and again and again.  You are exhausted.  They feel good while their character worsens.  Their future co-workers will wish you had required them to pick up after themselves.  And, as a cherry on top, you will get to do it all over again tomorrow.

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An 80% is telling your kids to be kind to each other—unkindly.   

A 20% activity is modeling kindness in tone and action while teaching.  

If your spouse’s love language is “words of affirmation,” it may be an 80% to clean the dishes to show them you love them.  In this instance, a 20% activity may be instead writing a specific, heartfelt compliment.  

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My final example will be a counselor joke:

“How many counselors does it take to change a lightbulb?”

“Just one – but the light bulb has to really want to change.”

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Trying to help someone who does not want to change is an 80%.  Targeting my effort to invest in someone who is wanting to grow: 20%.

By using the 80/20 Rule as part of deciding what goes onto your calendar, you will never have to wonder if you are focusing on the most important thing again. 

Add the 80/20 Rule to your daily decisions and transform your life.

Does this help?

Please comment below and let me know!

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Christine Wilson, LPC

Co-Founder Think Time

 

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We have a serious problem.  We are losing valuable time.  We have created an innovative process that helps people clarify their vision so they can live their lives focused on what matters most.  

Shop Think Time today!

Blog Highlights:

Look at activities—not for how much effort we put into them, but for the results that flow from them.

Do my activities move the needle toward my goals?

About 20% of our activities generate 80% of our results.

All of our activities are not high-yielding and often “good” activities steal time from the best.

Use the 80/20 Rule.  You will never have to wonder if you are focusing on the most important thing again.

 

Just Start!

One of my favorite entrepreneurial concepts is found in a small and practical book called Just Start.

Written by seasoned business leaders from Babson College, this book debunks myths about a curious group of people–serial entrepreneurs.  Many people imagine entrepreneurs testing ideas in a laboratory and perfecting them over and over again before finally releasing them to the public.

Not so.

After studying serial entrepreneurs, the research team discovered that people who started successful business after successful business had one thing in common–they started.

They most often started small–only investing what they were willing to lose.  Then, they learned…and adjusted…and, launched again.

Then, they learned…and adjusted…and, launched again.

This process gives the benefit of real-time feedback and data that can never be gained in a laboratory.  Each idea was sharpened by real feedback from real life and real people.  Because they never invested more than they were willing to lose, they always won.  They either found out quickly and cheaply that the idea was not going to fly, or they gained invaluable feedback that sharpened their product or idea so it could launch to the next level.

What’s your idea?

Is there a way that you can start small–only investing what you are willing to lose?

Launch it, but hold it loosely.  Allow it to come back changed–only to launch it again.

Can you create a Version 1.0 and get it in front of the world?

Go ahead!  Get it out there!  What do you want to create?

Go for it!

Christine M. Wilson

Licensed Professional Counselor, Co-founder of Think Time

 

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Start small. @thinktimetweets http://ow.ly/AHrg30figwg

Investing only what you are willing to lose. http://ow.ly/AHrg30figwg

Launch, learn, adjust, launch again. http://ow.ly/AHrg30figwg

Sharpen your ideas with real feedback from real people.  http://ow.ly/AHrg30figwg

What’s your idea? @thinktimetweetshttp://ow.ly/AHrg30figwg

What do you want to create?  Go ahead!  Get it out there!   http://ow.ly/AHrg30figwg

Go for it!  @thinktimetweets http://ow.ly/AHrg30figwg

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For people who want more time to focus on what matters most.

Free e-book “How to Live Your Purpose” http://ow.ly/AHrg30figwg

Shop Think Time Purpose Planners at think-time.com

Achieve Your Goals and Feel Good About It!

Did you know that you are designed to feel good while you achieve your goals?

 

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It’s true!

Wired in your biology is a feedback system that allows you to feel “good” while you pursue what matters to you.

In this blog we will discuss how taking time to Think Time can utilize the dopamine feedback system to boost your energy and improve your motivation as you pursue your goals.

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Dopamine is a biologically based chemical that provides energy and motivation.  Stated simply, when the dopamine reward system is activated, you are biologically encouraged to repeat what you just did.  At the same time, the memory centers of the brain are activated.  They seem to be saying, “Pay close attention to what just happened!  We want this to happen again!”

One of the healthy ways in which you can engage the dopamine reward system is by moving toward clear goals.

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When you take tangible steps toward a goal you clearly have in your mind, you get a shot of dopamine.

This is why setting a clear goal and accomplishing it feels so good.

This is why crossing things off your to do list feels so good.

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This is also why we write things down just to cross them off when we forgot to put it on our to do list.  Crossing it off gives us a shot of dopamine!

This seems too easy.

What’s the catch?

The catch is that you must see your goal clearly.

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None of us pursues vague accomplishments.

Can you imagine it?

“On your mark, get set, go!  Run for a long time!”

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No!

We train to run exactly 13.1 or 26.2 miles!

…and as each mile marker reinforces that we are closer to our goal, we get a shot of dopamine!  This boost enhances our performance by providing energy and motivation toward our clear goal.

We pursue goals that are clear and we feel happy about our accomplishments.

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What do we do with this information?

Now that you know that your brain is giving automatic feedback and energy boosts to areas with clear goals, take some Think Time to assess the clarity that you have created around different areas of your life.

Most of us have clear goals at the gym and at work but we have no clear goals when it comes to marriage, parenting, personal growth, spirituality, money, service, and relationships.

Build clarity in these areas of your life with Think Time’s Think Zones, and notice the difference in how you feel as you pursue your goals.

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Think Zones are included in the Yearly and Quarterly Think Times in Think Time Journal Planners.

Chances are, you are going to feel really good and…

you are going to want to do it again!!

Christine Wilson

Think Time Co-Founder

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Think Time Life Leadership System

Use your whole brain to plan your whole life.

Shop now at think-time.com.

 

Blog Highlights

You are designed to feel good while you achieve your goals.  @thinktimetweets 

Boost your energy and improve your motivation as you pursue your goals with Think Time.  @thinktimetweets

When you take tangible steps toward a goal you clearly have in your mind, you get a shot of dopamine. @thinktimetweets

We pursue goals that are clear and we feel happy about our accomplishments.  @thinktimetweets

Your brain is giving automatic feedback and energy boosts to areas with clear goals. @thinktimetweets

Most of us have clear goals at the gym and at work but we have no clear goals when it comes to other important areas of our lives. @thinktimetweets

Assess the clarity that you have created around different areas of your life. @thinktimetweets

Build clarity in more areas of your life with Think Time’s Think Zones. @thinktimetweets

You must see your goal clearly. @thinktimetweets